New Relationships And Holidays

Everyone celebrates the holidays, even if your like me and don't install a single ornament or go to church or a parade or even a party. Christmas gets celebrated every year and we all wake up, coexist and live in celebration each day.

The humility of Christianity make me think this huge messy Santa celebration thing is so unChristmas except in the way it isn't for a handful of people.

I try to be in that handful, yet I often miss Christmas altogether -- except dinner with friends because we're all on holiday.

Celebrate simple and pure. Our planet needs the attention over *#@%^ Christmas.

"Thoughts"

Thoughts are just that -- thoughts.  Things we don't really know exactly what they are or how they are actually formed, except that often they are based on experience, reality and imagination, are always present.

Most "thoughts" stay silently tucked away inside each of our brains for our own use, examination, experience and then -- the internet appeared and now we can just *POOF* write our thoughts and send them out of our brains.  I don't find emptying my brain of its thoughts ever works, though, even if i type or record every single one of them, there are always more of them waiting to be seen, heard, recognized or even, if so lucky, expressed and shared.

People often like to define us by the thoughts we've chosen to express (or not express in certain situations), and well, if they need to do that, they may and you should know that people do do that -- define you by what they THINK you said when you expressed THAT thought there.

Earth.  A prison system right now.

He's Moody

Men intrigue me. When men are moody they are mostly annoying probably in the way we women are when we are moody. Yet, moody men are most intriguing until they are just silly.

Normal is hard to know if moody is their way of life.  The work in relationships isn't worth it if the moody ones don't understand (or try to understand) their rhythms.

Spend your time with those who work as hard as you do at making yourselves and your world better.

best layed plans

usually have been thought about for a long time, written down, edited and modified many many times.  so why not in life, can we plan our own . . . life?

i wonder that and then think about what i would write today.  today, my dad died.  i'm very sad.  i would have written a very different story for me and my dad to experience if i was the writer of our lives together, yet i was not -- except as the child sitting here writing this.

i would have written a happy life for us -- which would need to have excluded my mother from all of our reality except for perhaps before age . . . 13.  she was cool until i turned 13. then, i don't know what happened -- something like a combination of Pat Robertson meets Fox News hit.  It seemed like nothing they taught me before then mattered.

we never reconciled, yet i do think they know i love them the same as i always did, even with all that hate and stuff they hold onto so tight.  well, dad, you don't need to hold on to it any more.  enjoy infinity, i hear its fun.

FUQEDITORS

because i have a boyfriend that i had been having sex with everyday -- at least once -- for seven weeks, except 2 days, and then there was Thanksgiving Dinner with his daughter and her man.

#Thanksgiving.

should be so simple unless you just want to make every thing that you #MustHave on #Thanksgiving because that's just what we do, not what we really, truly want or actually care about.

#Gorging.  That's what was happening, and what planet earth reality came to say #FuqThat, THAT reality is #Unsustainable if you want to continue living.

My new boyfriend, or at least trying to be my new "Man" (yet in his head its more like "MAN" I am most certain), as such could be a challenge if you live the reality i am living as my daughter chooses to attend a fuqing public high school with her friends from junior high - - don't ask, long story -- had a seizure right as we were finishing dinner.

He's still recovering today -- wow what a journey of WOW bam WOW bam WOW -- yet, still, nothing as bad as jail, so i smile and keep on stepping as fast as possible to teh drum i'm hearing that's going to bring this #fuqafukushima reality to a happy ending as we step forward to ? ? ?

tomorrow is a new day.  i am enjoying having a boyfriend =)