writing now as

a labyrinth of time
plays rather true
finding a knot
it never knew.
quickly undone
unravelling great fun
love got sooo lost
in its mirroring
just one
vibe.

twas the night before christmas

we all have one of those stories don't we.

this isn't what chrismas eve is supposed to be like, is it?

all alone.  whether you are literally all alone or in a room full of people, you are all alone.

what makes this story even more tragic, is you don't have to be all alone, but you make the choice to do so.

i know.

the truth is, what i thought it was, isn't what it is, so, yes i do have to be alone, until i find that which i am looking for.  i already committed to that, which is why i am alone.

and now ... i am going to have a dinner prepared by a bonafide French chef, and go and hang with my friends -- like i would just because we want to hang out.  so, then i'll be all alone with them, and they are the best people to be all alone with, especially on the night before christmas!

and then, the real truth is, that there are countless people who are all alone tonight because their circumstances and today is really just another day in the life of, and this is the first year where christmas is merely an excuse to have parties with my friends while my daughter is on vacation.